Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Watching Golf?

I'm thinking I should compile some of the responses on my last post to give to my students and residents so they can get some perspective on what patients and other clinicians think about the topic.

A couple of things I wanted to to clarify:
  • Orange did not, in fact, spontaneously accuse me of having a stick up my ass. She simply agreed with me when I asked whether I did.
  • Although I address my patients in a formal way, I don't think my manner with them is formal. I welcome—no, encourage—their input, laugh and joke with them, pat their shoulders. A few of them routinely hug me, and a couple have kissed me. (One kissed me on the lips once. An experience I hope is never repeated.) And despite my byline, I have never actually uttered the words "That's Doctor Mama to you," except in jest.
I haven't been on the blogosphere much lately because things are fraying a bit around the edges here. One of my colleagues called me this weekend to report that she was having weakness in her hand and leg, and her rheumatologist thought she should be admitted to the hospital, but what did I think? When I told her to get her butt to the hospital stat, she said, "But who's going to take care of the baby?" "Er, where's your husband?" I asked. "Downstairs watching golf on TV."

I ended up meeting her at the hospital and staying with her the first few hours. She's doing okay, but she has a pretty scary condition, and a lot on her plate. Her husband is being a father finally (with the help of his mother), but I'm not sure it will last once she gets home. She's talking about changing jobs to decrease the stress in her life. I wish she'd change husbands instead. I've been filling in for her as much as I can at the office; one of my mothers-in-law is staying with us, so TrophyHusband has help at home ... and I'm terribly, terribly grateful that this is pretty much the extent of what I have to grumble about.

8 comments:

Annie said...

Your last post and the subsequent responses could provide a ton of cultural insight (into this very likely not discussed issue) for your students and residents.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking, replace "stick" with "golf club" and that might get her twit of a husband moving!

Anonymous said...

Forgot to post my name - Fiona

Artemis said...

"watching golf"...I'm so frustrated I can't even begin to say anything else!

Rachel said...

Men like that scare the crap out of me. I was diagnosed with lupus at 17 and I hate looking at every guy I date and thinking, "Would he sit on his ass in front of the TV while I cried because I couldn't take care of my (hypothetical) kids during a flare some day?" You're a good friend to help her out like that, I'm sure she was more grateful than you know.

amusing said...

It is so hard for some people to ask for help -- and therefore so terrific of people like you to offer it -- and mean it!

Men. Feh.

terri c said...

Your friend's husband? Could you arrange for him to have a nerve conduction test? Daily? Done by someone who is really not very good at it? I think he needs some penance... Hope your friend will be OK.

DoctorMama said...

She's finally home and doing all right, though she has more procedures to get through and won't be back at work for a long time. And when I called her at home yesterday, her husband was ... out golfing! (Her cousin was over chasing the baby around.)

She is the sort of person who gets immense satisfaction from doing for everyone else, so I think that she is at least rewarded in this way by her marriage. And I know that you can never tell what a marriage is truly like unless you're in it. But nevertheless, he is a jerk.