Monday, April 03, 2006

Be Especially Careful if They're Foaming at the Mouth

All is cool in the DM household, including AngelBaby. And even in the throes of fever, he was cool enough to insist on trying on his new sun-protection suit and sunglasses:



I keep hearing that Pink Floyd song in my head, Comfortably Numb – you know, “When I was a child, I had a fever / My hands felt just like two balloons.” (Not the Scissor Sisters version, though I like that one too.) I’m not sure if AB hallucinated, but from the looks of him I wouldn't be surprised.

My mom is the coolest one. She came last-minute, on her birthday, for crying out loud, to help out, and she was amazing. Some day I’ll have to blog about my mother.

So I heard a pretty good dumb patient story just today. One of my colleagues does travel medicine, meaning she sees people who are about to go abroad and counsels them on vaccinations, malaria prophylaxis, etc. Of course, one of her first questions is “where are you traveling?” Today she saw a guy who answered rather pompously, “Well, that’s confidential.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m involved in celebrity transport. I could be going anywhere. You’d better just give me everything.”

“I see.”

“Including smallpox.”

“Smallpox? Really? You’re traveling where there are outbreaks of smallpox?” she asked disingenuously.

“Oh yes,” he said. “In Russia, you know. And the Ukraine.”

So she told him that she actually couldn’t give him smallpox, but that if necessary, he should contact the CDC. He nodded importantly.

“And will you be traveling to Sub-Saharan Africa?” she asked.

“Definitely,” he said. “I’ll be accompanying [famous movie star] to South Africa.”

“Well, you’re right, technically that is below the Sahara,” she said, “but usually we classify it as Southern Africa, which is a bit different.”

“I know,” he said. “And really you don’t need to worry there anyway, because it’s a British colony.”

“Um, well …”

Finally he said, “Oh, also give me rabies.”

“Rabies?”

“Yes, because I’ll be traveling with [famous rock band].”

“And will they be biting you?” she asked.

9 comments:

emjaybee said...

well, that depends on the band. Though Ozzy hasn't bitten anyone in years...heh.

so glad the little one is all better. Husband and child are both showing signs of sniffles here, here's hoping they don't get too bad.

Kat said...

Heh. I'm vaccinated for rabies. Go vet school go!

I love stories of any sort - colleague, patient, student :-)

Keep me from studying more!!

Mignon said...

Oh my, look at the little sickie. His little arms and legs hardly fill out the swimsuit.

My daughter has a couple of those - they're nice for freeezing cold swim lessons.

Cecily said...

Thanks for the spittake. Cleaning off my keyboard now...

E. said...

Love the shades.

Also love the biting rockband question. That's good humor. (You should have a small drum kit in your office, to provide rimshots at the appropriate moments!)

bihari said...

This post has a marvelously surreal quality: it's the photo of the adorable and so-cool boy, combined with the patient who is clearly coming from another dimension. Makes me very happy.

Becky said...

hahaha- thanks DoctorMama!
Glad AB is better. 106 would have had me camping out in the ER.

Alexa said...

Bwahaha! And the picture of AngelBaby almost stopped my heart, with the cuteness. Glad he is feeling better.

Fat Doctor said...

I've been reading your site for awhile and am linking to you over at Fat Doctor unless for some reason that ticks you off and you contact me in the next 30 seconds or so.

AngelBaby is adorable in that suit. I think I'll head over to Ebay and buy one for Son right now!